What Makes a Good Marriage Retreat?

What Makes a Good Marriage Retreat?

What To Look For When Considering a Marriage Retreat?

During the past 25 years, Lori and I have provided relationship therapy for hundreds of couples. Our extensive experience, across a broad array of issues, has taught us what is necessary for therapy to be its most effective.

What Does It Take?

First, both partners must learn new ways of interacting. They must master skills for solving problems, listening, dealing with anger, frustration and passivity, and creating quality interactions. Second, they must practice these new ways of interacting until deep and authentic change takes place. Third, they must be guided to examine the places where they are stuck or blocked that interfere with this change.

Rarely does once-a-week therapy allow for these three criteria to be met, regardless of how long the therapy goes on. Momentum matters in therapy. The right frequency of sessions is critical to long-lasting success.

The Proven Solution

Our solution, and one that has worked well for us over the past 25 years, is this:  The retreat model calls for initial intensive therapy away from home, followed by at-home sessions as needed. We have the couple stays for seven days at accommodations near our Institute. We meet with them three hours each day and then have them use the rest of the day to practice the skills and techniques we discussed. This concentrated focus on healing the relationship is very effective when done away from work, kids and other stressors.

A Co-Therapy Team Makes a Big Difference

We have found it utterly useful to provide a co-therapy team for each session. In therapy, we actually treat three clients:

  • the two partners and the relationship itself.
  • Each partner learns new ways of interacting.
  • Then the relationship itself – the special entity that the two partners create – is treated to help it become a healthy, supportive force.

This is a complicated process, so we assign one therapist to each partner and then unite them as a co-therapy team to work on the relationship. By doing this, strong therapeutic relationships are built with each partner, while avoiding the possibility of bias when one partner feels the therapist is siding with the other partner.

Our unique and time-tested marriage counseling retreat approach has restored passion, intensity, and love to relationships that had deteriorated due to neglect and misunderstanding.

After the retreat ends, couples follow up with us, or for those couples from out of town, they can follow-up with a local therapist or with us via Skype. These follow-up visits insure that positive changes are maintained and daily stresses and misunderstandings do not damage the new foundation the partners built at the retreat.


Contact us today to learn more about us and how we may customize a Marriage/Couples Retreat for you.

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